I have more puns for your reading pleasure, I'm still not sorry for posting them ;D
Read them, Read them now!!!

1. I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'.

2. The roundest knight at king Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

3. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

4. There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.

5. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.

6. The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

7. Always trust a glue salesman. They tend to stick to their word.

8. Don't trust people that do acupuncture, they're back stabbers.

9. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.

10. Did you hear about the crime that happened in a parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.

11. I knew a woman who owned a taser, man was she stunning!

12. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

13. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

14. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

15. I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

16. I used to be a banker but I lost interest

17. Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

18. Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

19. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

20. I couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

21. Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

22. When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.

23. A man just assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy.

24. My friend's bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.

25. I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

26. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Still not sorry xD