First, a bit of background:
I started with the original Wipeout back in '95 at the PlayStation launch. I played the hell out of the demo, and I purposely timed out during the game just so I wouldn't have to face those loading screens again. I even forced my cousin to get a copy so I could see those extra weapons in Link Mode! I'm not sure I unlocked Firestar (I did a few weeks ago on my PSP, though)... but I at least unlocked Rapier.
Then one day I came home and I saw the Wipeout XL intro, which was the coolest thing ever. It was was one of the few games for the PS1 that I was really, really looking forward to. I got good enough to beat Challenge II and earned the Piranha ship with Qirex.
For some reason, my brother got an N64, but at least he got Wipeout 64 too. The control was kinda nice, I guess... but those new weapons sucked. I don't really remember how far I got in that game. I think I unlocked Piranha, or something.
I had heard about Wipeout 3, but I didn't really care for it and didn't bother getting it. "Surely," I thought, "Wipeout XL was the best Wipeout game and always will be!"
And for a long while, it looks like that was true. For better or worse, I never even heard of Wipeout Fusion (I imported a Japanese PS2 at launch, so Tekken Tag Tournament was my main), and I didn't want a PSP of my own until I saw my brother playing Wipeout Pure.
With all this talk about PS1 games on PSP, I decided to hunt around for Wipeout 3. I paid $1 plus $5 shipping on eBay, and having now played it, that's about as high as I'd pay...
- Right off the bat, you have the WORST intro ever. Not just among Wipeout games, but... ever. In any game. I honestly thought my game was defective, but then... no. The music doesn't fit - certainly not inspiring (like the original), not sweat-inducing (like XL), and not pure and awesome (like Pure). I guess the team logo part was cool, but then... "Piranha" was misspelled. Seriously, what the hell?
- Next, you have the hard-to-read, confusing, ugly-as-sin menu. Let's be honest - it could have been done on the NES. No track previews for the sake of "simplicity?" Lame. And why can't I hit up or down on the d-pad to actually select the track and ship, even though it sure LOOKS like I can? Instead I have to hit left and right, which is... kinda stupid. Who would have thought functionality only got WORSE in the future?
- Then if you manage to get a race started without wanting to kill yourself, you realize that most of the tracks are also extremely ugly with their dark, drab colors. And maybe it's just my monitor, but all that darkness made the game literally unplayable as early as... well, Porto Kora (moreso, anyway).
- No actual lap display. Because nice, big numbers would have been too easy on the eyes, especially in the middle of the race.
- The ships are TOO quiet. Dammit, I LIKED that subtle "fizzzzz" in XL. There's almost none of that in 3. There's not even a sound for Hyper-thrust, so I don't even feel like I'm going hyper-fast.
- Crappy weapons. Force wall? Reminds me of Wipeout 1 when you'd successfully hit a ship with your rocket, only to create a huge roadblock that you'd have to try REALLY hard to avoid. Reflector? So for 10 seconds or so, I'm supposed to switch from "please oh please don't hit me omg" to "HA HA!! Hit me now! But only RIGHT NOW and for the next few seconds, and NOT with Mines!" More often than not, it seems to be there just so the computer can legitimately stop you from using Energy Drain. And Cloak? Who cares. Just more weapons I have to cycle through in order to get the not-as-satisfying Quake or the now-ugly Rockets...
- No ACTUAL Turbo means Hyper-thrust is required... which means as far as pickups go, the Energy Drain pickup is also the Turbo pickup... which makes Feisar suck.
- The voice during the race tells you the weapon YOU got. Were people actually clamoring for this? So now when I'm about to get hit by a weapon, all I get is "WARNING!" It's just not as satisfying when you stop without knowing exactly what hit you. It's as though the computer just says, "HEY, YOU STOP NOW."
- Really bad ping-pong effects. The slow Auto Pilot doesn't help things, either. I never realized how much I missed that THUNK from the original Wipeout.
- And finally, UNLOCKING EVERYTHING IS A CHORE. Unlike in Wipeout Pure, I almost dreaded getting golds in Wipeout 3 because that just meant I'd just have to slug through more tracks with ships I really don't like.
I'll admit that the game is not all bad. Music is opinion, as always, and while I did like most of it, I can't say that it was racing music. The fact that the music stayed during a pause or restart was nice, and the loading times were nice and quick.
(Still... I hate this game and everyone who enjoys it more than XL or Pure!)