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dreadofmondays
31st March 2014, 09:16 PM
Hey guys!

We did a lot of playtesting during the last few months and we've determined several things about our game modes.
Firstly, we discovered that players like to win, and hate losing. So we've made some modifications and removed all game modes in which it is possible to lose. Competitive online races will now be rubberbanded, designed so that everyone crosses the finish line at the same time. Weapon drops can be annoying for some, so we've removed them and replaced them with our new unicorn pickup, designed to produce rainbows and make people happy.

We also discovered that players don't like games that are too difficult. Therefore, we hope you enjoy our new game mode ZODE, carefully named so as to not infringe copyright of the famous ZONE mode. In this game mode, your speed starts out at sub-alpha and remains there throughout the mode so as to not stress you out too much. Points are awarded for travelling forward, and a permanent pilot assist is on to prevent you from hitting the walls, because that can impede progress.

Track design has also changed. Tricky corners and twists can be slightly stressful to understand, and require time spent practicing. This is unacceptable, so we have removed all tracks and replaced them with an infinite flat plane, with finish lines placed equidistant to the centre. Now no matter what direction you go, you will always win, but we realise steering can be tricky, so we've also removed all player input and implemented an permanent autopilot that will always get you to the finish first.

We hope you enjoy the improved SSGX!

Darkdrium777
1st April 2014, 05:56 AM
Game of the year. Beats out Goat Simulator.

DIXI200
1st April 2014, 08:07 AM
You have provided a good chat, so we can talk .. sipping drinks while we see our quick ship on autopilot ..:g

possesed13
1st April 2014, 08:12 AM
wow great improvements... is there any chance to put some boobs in?
lol

dreadofmondays
1st April 2014, 08:32 AM
Yes.. as $50.00 DLC ;)

JABBERJAW
1st April 2014, 10:53 PM
Sounds great! Its still better than that game "racers" for pc

Colonel
2nd April 2014, 09:57 AM
wow great improvements... is there any chance to put some boobs in?
lol

Hahaha :)